According to my culture, or the way that I was raised, I was told to basically follow these certain standards that would qualify me as being more of a “woman” to others. There were moments where my mom would tell me that a woman’s responsibility is to try to make the man happy by providing food since the man would be providing for the family. For instance, at the age of 9, I had to learn how to make chai (milk tea) so that whenever guests came over, I’d be the one to make it. The one thing that I would hear each time I would make it would be “wow she’ll make such a good wife when she grows up.” When I’d hear this, I would just get shy but now that I’m older, I feel like this is such a wrong mindset to have. Why should there be some kind of checklist as to what would make someone a “good wife?” My family thinks that my identity should be chosen by them which is why I’ve been struggling with my identity all my life since I’ve been listening to everything that they would tell me to do. All of my relatives have also continue to do this by making sure that I’m well prepared for the day that I would hypothetically be married. Lately though, I’ve been straying away from what is expected as a woman and am trying to figure myself out more. I’m definitely not going to pass on the tradition that they have been passing on from generation to generation where they would instill ideas as to what would make you a “good woman/wife.”